Stripping and Internet Pornography
Is sex very different for men and women? Steven Soderbergh discussing his new film Magic Mike talked about men and women visiting strip clubs. For men it is a solitary, and predatory exercise where the fantasy does not stop at the end of the show. Women go to strip clubs in groups and it is a laugh which finishes at the end of the show.

The role of fantasy for men and women appears to be different. This is a complex area with many strands. The history of men and women, of men owning women’s bodies, and  the stronger physicality of men dominating women all point to the subjugation of women. The violence in film and television towards women sexualises and glorifies violence against women. Recently the book Fifty Shades of Grey has raised the game of women’s fantasy to compete with men.
There is more sex selling products than ever before. The sexualisation of youth forces youth to start younger. Internet pornography is so easy to access that it has become normalised and mainstream. The internet enables people to disguise their identities, so that they can be disinhibited to play any sexual role without being discovered.

From the film Closer there is a sex chat room scene where two men are messaging to each other over the internet. The Jude Law character pretends to be a blonde graphically explaining her sexual masturbation and behaviour. The more naïve doctor character played by Clive Owen is taken in by this pretense, and wants to arrange a meeting.  How had the Jude Law character behaved?  Was he seeking revenge? He looked disinterested and bored. Is he using humans as objects? Is this fun?
Is this healthy?
Unresolved issues of power, control, and hatred can be acted out sexually. How we deal with this in relationship to ourselves and others starts at the beginning of our personal histories. How we learn and are introduced to love and sex contributes to our sexuality.

What is healthy has become confused. Does pornography demean women, and give men unrealistic expectations about sex in real life? Or is pornography a healthy outlet that stops the acting out of more violent sexual fantasies?
In 2012 we can be what we want to be more than ever before. The upside is that we have more choices on how to live our lives. The downside is arguable: we can be whoever we want to be: but if that is deemed unacceptable or unhealthy then there is less than ever before that people, government or state can do about it. Responsibility is the guardian of choice and freedom.
Stripping and Internet Pornography

Copyright Adrian Scott North London Counsellor Blog 2012
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Disclaimer: This weblog content are the views of the writer and for general information only.
This article is designed to provoke argument and critique.