The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion. – Albert Camus

The way we live is an expression of ourselves. The problem is that it is difficult to see how we can do this if we are unaware of the influences and forces that make us.
How did I get here?

Before our creation our creators had their own values and ideals – With varying degrees of awareness. The act of making a child is essentially narcissistic. It is not about the child. It is about the creators. The creators’ wishes, compensations are conciously and unconsciously projected onto the new human.

So the new human will be to some degree always missed. They are the creation, of others. The creators’ power of expectations win out. The act of living and putting meaning to life is to some extent for the new human to fill in the gaps of their own wishes and desires. This is a challenging task as the creators’ powerful projections blur, twist, and contort what is real to the new human.

Freud recorded this as transference. The human repeating in unawareness the pattern of the creators’ projections. Awareness is a lifting of the mist and seeing the ruins. Always there. But not really seen without the fog of the creators’ wishes and desires for their creation obstructing the scene.

Transference is intent on safety and reproduction. Nothing else. It doesn’t care. It wants you to repeat and attach to the familiar to feel safe. It doesn’t discern the quality of the repetition. It just wants to repeat.

So living your life freely you must crack your own transference code. Even then difficult to live freely from what helped you survive.

Copyright Adrian Scott
North London Counsellor Blog 2021
All Rights Reserved
Disclaimer: This weblog is the view of the writer and for general information only
This article is designed to provoke argument and critique