Everyone is doing it. Talking about deep personal issues to the world. There seems to be no limts about what you can say to a huge audience, and then have it commented on by the world.

And it has always been. In the pre digital age TV, newspapers, & books were used to tell your personal story. And then there’s the money.

But what do they want? To be heard? To be agreed with? To be criticised? To be flattered? To be right? To gain attention?

What is not desired is the hard painful work to process feelings! To sit with yourself or guidance from another, and be present with your fear and pain.

Why bother when you can find instant gratification by telling the world your issues? Then wait for the compliments and support from far away strangers. A quick fix. But at depth nothing changed. So you have to do it again. and again ….

You are the expert on you. You might need some help to recognise this. But it is true. Nobody else has led your life or felt your pain except you.

And then speaking to people about yourself becomes a bonus. Not the main event. Being your own expert means you can work yourself out with the help of friends and family. BUT .. you do the bulk of the work yourself. Alone on your own.

“We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and-in spite of True Romance magazines-we shall all someday look back on our lives, and see that, in spite of our company we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely-at least, not all the time-but essentially and finally alone. This is what makes your self respect so important, and I don’t see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.”
Hunter S. Thompson

Copyright Adrian Scott
North London Counsellor Blog 2021
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This article is designed to provoke argument and critique