6. Hostess Grope

So the President’s Club has closed after reports of hostesses being groped, and propositioned by rich powerful businessmen. This was revealed by two undercover reporters from the Financial Times.
In the post Weinstein era more and more industries are coming out & recognising men abuse women physically, sexually and financially.
Hostess Grope

In this era of patriarchy where men use power to subjugate women, it is difficult to look at mens’ sexuality in an undistorted way. It seems that a large majority of hetrosexual men’s desire, want, or instinct is to try and have sex with as many women as they can. Men use status, money and power to attempt to do this.
Is this selfishness, greed, or an inbuilt imprint to procreate?

At this time the predominant norm is that hetrosexual men and women have couple relationships which children can be born into to create family units. There are issues of fidelity and trust which both sides subscribe to excluding anyone else from the partnership. Monogamy. There are many cultural norms to support monogamy, so it remains undisputed socially. But more critically it is an internal value deeply stamped into our psyche.

So on the one hand this male behaviour is selfish and greedy. Men should be able to control their urges. Society expects men to behave to the norms of Monogamy.

On the other hand Monogamy doesn’t appear to contain male behaviour. Mens’ behaviour must be repressed. Mens’ clubs exist where women are made available to men. The use of prostitutes and the sex industry is rife, and the rise(?) of human trafficking of women and men increases.

But even to start to have debates around the topic of male & female sexuality seems threatening and to undermine the basic building block of society: the family. Perhaps we could start to admit however civilised and technologically advanced we are: we still have very primitive brains, which determine primitive behaviour.
Hostess Grope

 

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5. FOMO

FOMO – Fear Of Missing Out is the anxiety of being left out from what other people are doing through social media. People write about the highlights of their lives on media platforms making their lives look continuously special. This creates anxiety and anger in the spectator who feels their life is boring, and they are missing out.

Though FOMO is exasperated by social media it has always been so.
Throughout time.

To survive we have to know what is going on around us. In a tribe this could mean the difference between life and death. The feeling of anxiety and fear is a signal that we need to pay more attention to out external world and the people in it. To feel that we are not part of what is going triggers a primitive part of the brain into fight or flight mode.

How ever modern the medium: we are still humans interacting with the medium. Our brains are slow to adapt to the modern world. In fact they are designed for a life no longer lived. Technology keeps pushing ahead while our brains stay fixed in the natural animal world.  

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4. Peter Wyngarde 1927-2018

Peter Wyngarde‘s birthdate, and place of birth were disputed.
His Father was part of the British Diplomatic Core.

He was an actor who played up the camp side of maleness in the 1970s to such a degree that most others would have failed. He carried am ambiguity of maleness with such flair that he was believable.

By 1971 it was reported that “more babies [had been] christened Jason during the last 12 months than ever before”.

His most famous role was the sleuth Jason King. The charcater’s most famous quote was: “A bit too early for coffee … I think I’ll have Scotch.” Apparently he claimed to be bisexual attracting men and women alike.
He was the inspiration for Austin Powers Man of Mystery.

What a life.
Peter Wyngarde 1927-2018

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Disclaimer: This weblog is the view of the writer and for general information only
This article is designed to provoke argument and critique

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Peter Wyngarde‘s birthdate, and place of birth were disputed.
His Father was part of the British Diplomatic Core.

He was an actor who played up the camp side of maleness in the 1970s to such a degree that most others would have failed. He carried am ambiguity of maleness with such flair that he was believable.

By 1971 it was reported that “more babies [had been] christened Jason during the last 12 months than ever before”.

His most famous role was the sleuth Jason King. The charcater’s most famous quote was: “A bit too early for coffee … I think I’ll have Scotch.” Apparently he claimed to be bisexual attracting men and women alike.
He was the inspiration for Austin Powers Man of Mystery.

What a life.
Peter Wyngarde 1927-2018

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Disclaimer: This weblog is the view of the writer and for general information only
This article is designed to provoke argument and critique

 



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3. Amatonormative

Amatonormative is defined by author Elizabeth Blake as “the assumption that a central, exclusive, amorous relationship is normal for humans, in that it is a universally shared goal, and that such a relationship is normative, in the sense that it should be aimed at in preference to other relationship types.”

To think differently is unimaginable. Our DNA at this time is soaked in the sense, language, and feeling that exclusive couple relationships are the norm for humans to function properly. As ever it is difficult to untangle what is authentic and what is manipulated.

On the one hand monogamy is the natural state of human relationships. We thrive in exclusivity. Intimacy can be created in the singleness of one other. This intimacy can only be formed through exclusivity and trust that monogamy brings. Jealousy and insecurity are natural feelings that keep monogamy in place. Children and chattels are clear about who and where they belong. This is the natural human order which successful wealthy societies are built on.

On the other our culture enables us to be insecure and paranoid about who is going to look after our children if something happens. Because there is no collective community support that will do this for parents. To be alone is to be isolated so we cannot be left. Neo-liberalism particularly splits us into smaller and smaller groups who have to survive the threat of poverty, through redundancy, and ill health. We are all under the threat of the gutter, so have to work hard to stay out of it.

The ideal singularity of Romance is the bedrock of this monogamy. This is particularly aimed at women in a patriarchal system. Women are taught to have a natural desire for monogomy. This keeps her and her sexuality in place. In control. In system.

To tolerate what is not monogamous is to tolerate social anxiety about who is having sex with who. It is not the sex that is important here but what it signifies. Romance is the glue of our culture, the idea of parenting and family. Notice how many politicians talk about family as the building block to normal culture. Anything outside monogamy is seen as focused on sex. So it is degraded.
Take your pick: but don’t think you can choose.
Amatonormative

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Disclaimer: This weblog is the view of the writer and for general information only
This article is designed to provoke argument and critique
Amatonormative

 

 

 

 

 



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2. Iuliana Tudos

Iuliana Tudos was walking through Finsbury park to meet her friends in Enfield.
She was stabbed and her body left in a disused building in the park. She was killed on Christmas Eve and only discovered 3 days later. She was 22yrs old.

Her friends retraced her steps, they must have known her habits well, and found her body in the park. Iuliana was of Russian and Greek origin, and began working as a barmaid in a pub in Camden. Her body was discovered close to where she lived.

Anyone with information is asked to call the dedicated incident room on 020 8785 8244, tweet MetCC or contact Crimestoppers anonymously on 0800 555111.

To donate to Iuliana’s fund click here!


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Disclaimer: This weblog is the view of the writer and for general information only
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1. Fck Feelings

Fck Feelings is a self help book with the view that life is hard, and negative feelings are part of life. 
Just accept what you cannot control. If your wishes are impossible and are never going to happen then stop wishing them.

Talking endlessly about a relationship that is never going to be any good is a waste of time.This is a book written by a Father and daughter who encourage you to stay grounded in common sense. Life is hard and the trick is not to take it personally. It’s hard for everyone not just you. It seems that successful people are honest and brutally realistic about their expectations. If you constantly dream about what is beyond your expectations then they are unlikely to be realised.

Does this mean that Americans in therapy are being conned into talking about themselves in terms of the impossible?Was Prince Charles correct bemoaning the fact that kids in the UK are taught that they can do anything they only have to wish it? And then from this have to go into therapy because they have not acheived their goals?The 21st Century view of success is now so distorted into instant dream to reality scenarios. Is it being internalised by the younger generations. Success can mean anything you want it to mean? Does this exclude dreaming about the future?

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Disclaimer: This weblog is the view of the writer and for general information only
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52. Paul Williams

Paul Williams died on the streets of Birmingham, UK.
He was homeless.
Homelessness is often the expression of trauma and unresolved grief acted out in a destructive way. 
Paul’s parents divorced when he was in his early teens. A vulnerable age for a boy coming to be a man: to have his home environment split into pieces. Supported and loved by family who could not keep supporting a life style spinning out of control.
When the source of love and succour betrays with a fracture in the parental relationship, the love becomes love and pain at the same time. Ambivalence sets in.

Paul managed to get off the drink, worked but again returned to excessive drinking.
Though Paul would do “anything for anyone,” the one person he seemed unable to help was himself. The trauma was unresolved for Paul. With no way, or opportunity to work with the trauma its grip maintained a control of extreme pain numbing and sabotage.
Returning to the streets is an environment which is so brutal that it has to be extreme numbed against. Extreme numbing without recognising that it is the extreme feelings that have to be numbed, not the environment. Living in a building affords comfort and a private space where thinking cannot not be held back. So best to return to the streets where the extreme numbing can resume.

There are services for homeless people to access in Birmingham. The problem is that accessing them requires a level of readiness and awareness that cannot be created.
Our thoughts are with Paul’s family at this traumatic time.
Paul Williams

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51. Dark Money

Dark Money is a book describing American Billionaires trying to influence and undermine the U.S Government and American Democracy. This right wing campaign is headed by the Koch Brothers who are determined to set the agenda for a Republican Revolution.

The Koch family background is a story of family embedded in the Nazi War Machine, with a corresponding mentality.  In 1960 Koch wrote “The colored man looms large in the Communist plan to take over America.”

The family worked and has paid millions to give power to the conservative right by demanding balance in political debate. This balance was focused on textbooks, television shows and news coverage. The war on Liberals was so effective that Barak Obama just after being elected was asked by a New York Times reporter if he was a socialist.

Between 2005 and 2008, the Kochs alone spent nearly $25m on organizations fighting climate reform. Conservative Organisations have spent $558m over seven years trying to discredit global warming.

And in a way why not? Billionaires have money to spend on furthering their companies profits. Government, Taxes, and People are in the way unless they are buying their products. People make demands for public services, accountability and fairness. For the Billionaire businessman this is like having a universal marketing department with limitless funds, and networks with the backup of of other Billionaires and their networks.
Dark Money



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50. Life Plow

Life is to plow.’ A reflection on struggle, success and the impermanence of both

‘Just like the bad things, the beautiful things are temporary too.’

Life Plow
Roberto Olivera was raised in poverty in southern California, where he worked the tomato fields alongside his mother and abusive stepfather, migrant workers from Mexico. Now in his 60s, financially successful and with a family of his own, Olivera has grown to understand the meaning behind his mother’s frequent refrain: ‘La vida es sufrir’ (‘Life is suffering’). With an understated melancholy, Field Song pairs Olivera’s poignant reflections with views of southern California’s agricultural landscapes, presenting hardship as both temporary and timeless.
Life Plow. 

Director: Brad Bischoff

Producer: Alex Hidalgo

Director of Photography: Casey Bohrnell

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49. Nuclear Save

Stanislav Petrov prevented a nuclear holocaust. Literally. Nuclear Save.
His job was to detect any nuclear attack coming from the US. He had helped install the facility which housed the Soviet Early Warning System named Oko translated as Eye. The bunker situated south of Moscow began a series of warnings that a nuclear weapons strike had been deployed. He was at the controls on the night of September 26th 1983 when it happened.

It was in the Cold War period when a few weeks earlier a Soviet jet had intercepted and shot down by mistake a civilian airliner killing everyone on board. Including a US Congressman and 60 Americans. Ronald Reagan was in charge at the White House. Reagan had issued plans for the European Missile Defense System which Russia saw as a major threat.

So both sides were hyper alert ready for the others next move. Petrov thought the chances of the warning being a genuine nuclear strike were 50/50. He didn’t want to be the person responsible for starting a Third World War. In fact the early warning system had been triggered by the reflection of the sun.
So he didn’t give the advice to his commanders to retaliate.
Nuclear Save

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